Daily Lessons from Life 17 July 2009

"Fri, Jul 17, 2009 The New Paper - 'The 15 years was a great blessing'

WHEN doctors discovered the unborn child had an extremely rare condition, leaving him with only 'half a heart', they tried to get his parents to abort him. His parents refused. Doctors then gave the baby three days to live.


But Andre Tang Jia Rong ended up being his parents' 15-year miracle until he died on Sunday. The teenager was born with hypoplastic left heart syndrome. Only the right side of his heart was formed. Put simply, he had only half a heart to pump blood around his body.

When his parents learnt this during a scan in the 22nd week of pregnancy, doctors advised them to abort him. According to Andre's parents, a doctor said at the time that his chances of surviving was very slim.


His mother, Mrs April Tang, 41, said: 'The doctor said I was still young... I could have another baby... We were so heartbroken. 'But I wanted to give Andre at least a chance at life, even if it cost us everything we had.

'I told him that I wanted him to have a name, an identity, an IC... And he did get one, last week.
'I wanted him to have friends, and secondary school friends, and he has tons of them.'

'Throughout his life, we've been through countless obstacles, ups and downs. And he has really fought the good fight.'


Mrs Tang added: 'He left us peacefully, in my arms, just like the way I held him when he first came to us.'

Andre's family and friends describe him as 'charming', 'cheerful' and 'immaculate'. He was the peacemaker in the family, who would solve problems instead of cause them.

Mr Tang said: 'Andre used to ask me: 'Why doesn't God take me back, so that in my next life, I can jump, swim, play, without catching my breath?'


Mr Tang said that before he died, Andre told his mother: 'Don't be sad. If I go, I'll be well-taken care of by God. Anyway, I'll be around. I'll be an angel looking around. I will help you all.' "

A sad and touching story of the love of the parents showered to their child. A courageous mother and a good kid who passed on perhaps prematurely!

I normally leave out the religious bit in my blog but I think this is an exception I can live with.

Lessons for me are:

1. parental love for their child is unconditional and they are willing to go through a lot of sacrifice to make their child's life as comfortable, enjoyable and meaningful as possible. They do not give up easily and they fight very very tenaciously and unwaveringly to provide for their beloved child. It is one of the greatest loves of all indeed;

2. the child has exceptional awareness in his parting words to his mother. How many of us can face death with such calmness and composure? Thinking not of the death that will be upon him but to comfort and reassure his mother who loved him most dearly not to be sad or worry! Courage and fortitude do not reside in adults nor do they required exceptional education to acquire. The young, sometimes, possessed them in abundance!;

3. I have come across quite a few premature deaths reporting in the last 2 weeks. I often questioned: why most young people die young? It is a question that will never have a satisfactory answer for me from the religious angle. I put it down to: this is life. As long as we have lived a life that does not put others in harms way deliberately, as long as we do as much good as we possibly can, we will be alright.

Life is but a short transition in the course of nature. Let it be when it comes though we must always try to prolong it if we can as there are many good things waiting for us to achieve for the human race and not just for ourselves!

My condolences to the Tangs on the loss of their cherished son. Rest in peace (and in the cradle of your God too).