Daily Lesson from Life 06 January 2009

"Tue, Jan 06, 2009 The New Paper - Netizens mourn blogger's death

THEY did not know her.


Yet, dozens of netizens found they could empathise with Miss Shandy Sim, a 30-year-old bank manager who blogged about her six-month battle with cancer.

Sadly, her story ended last week with the post: 'Shandy passed away this morning. We were all beside her when she left us peacefully.'


Her brother, Mr Edmund Sim, 28, a banking executive, had written this to inform those who had been following Miss Sim's online account of what turned out to be her last weeks.

She died of cervical cancer on 26Dec.


Mr Sim told The New Paper on Sunday that his sister was much loved by family and friends, with 80 mourners turning up for her funeral on Tuesday. More than 10 strangers also sent condolences through the blog and text messages to Mr Sim.

The end came just six months after a cancerous mass was discovered on Miss Sim's pelvis. In June, she began feeling pain in her left leg. Mr Sim said: 'Initially, she thought it was aching muscles as she had gym sessions. She had a healthy lifestyle and never drank or smoked.

'Only when her leg swelled up did we go for a medical check. By then, doctors said her cancer was at Stage3.'
What followed were four days of crying as the illness ended Miss Sim's hopes of having children. Soon after being diagnosed, Miss Sim, who was single and lived in a Tanglin condominium, set up a blog on her fight with cancer and her optimism that she would win the battle.

The blog, at http://shandysim.blogspot.com, touched the hearts of many netizens because of its positive attitude towards life and death, said her brother.


Titled 'Adventures of Radioactive Girl', the blog details her experiences while undergoing chemotherapy.

Despite the pain and discomfort, Miss Sim still managed to inject humour into her posts.

In one post, she wrote that she had lost a lot of weight after chemotherapy, ending the post by saying, 'Am waiting for Marie France Slimming Centre to endorse me. hehehe.'

In another, she wrote about losing control of her bladder while on heavy sedatives.
'My mum and aunt had put me in these amazingly huge diapers. I totally hate them. Not that I don't have a choice about wearing them. I can live in the loo. Haha,' she wrote."

Every now and then you will come across courageous people who fight against incredible odds and win while some lost. Before this young lady's ordeal, there was the USA Carnegie Mellon University Professor made famous by USA talk show hostess, Opra Winfrey, that gave 'My Last Lecture!'. He too died of cancer though he too fought a good fight!

Lessons for me are:

1. life is not always fair! Good nature and positive people who do not do any of the things that doctors said you should not do if you do not want to die young from one form of illness or the other contracted cancers and die young! Depending on your world view or religion, some say it is fate while others say it is God's (whoever your religion believed in) will;

2. when we face the final journey of our transient life, we can moan and groan and wallow in self-pity and hatred and bitterness on how unfair life has been to us or we can stay positive and get down to fighting the good fight and win, or lose! When we stay positive and try to keep an upbeat mood, it makes life easier for everyone who loved us. They are already being tormented as they felt hapless as they see us suffer in pains. Why made more people suffered when we alone suffered is bad enough!;

3. it will be tough to keep positive, especially when we feel the 'bad luck' is undeserving! Some may say Lu it is easy for you to write and talk about how to respond positive in the worst of situation because you were there! I say maybe they are right. But I know once it become a conscious idea in my mind to stay positive and make life easier for everyone who loved me, I know I will try to fulfill that. Only when I have the thought will I take actions!

I salute the gallant lady who blogged about her struggle with cancer. She has shown courage, compassion, and humour. May she rest in peace and in heaven. And finally, my condolences to the family.