About Me

My photo
I am a Practitioner of 'The 7e Way of Leaders' where a Leader will Envision, Enable (ASK for TOP D), Empower, Execute, Energize, and Evolve grounded on ETHICS!

Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Daily Lesson from Life 26 November 2008

"Wed, Nov 26, 2008 The Straits Times

Dad couldn't pull plug on son

When his 18-year-old son met with a road accident in the United States in 1983 and went into a coma, American doctors advised Dr Tan (not his real name) to 'let your son go'.


After all, the young man had permanent brain damage and could survive only as a human vegetable, they said.
As a medical doctor, he knew what that meant. But as a father, he could not bring himself to pull the plug.

'As a doctor, I knew he had only a 4 per cent chance to live and even if he were to survive, he would be a vegetable. But this is my son. I couldn't let him die,' said the senior practitioner, who looks to be in his 70s and spoke on condition that his identity not be revealed.


His son went on to live for 18 more years, paralysed and often needing help from machines. He died from pneumonia in 2000 at the age of 36.

Dr Tan and his wife have three other children - two sons and a daughter.

Said Dr Tan: 'The 18 years caring for him involved a lot of money and sacrifice for my wife and me. But we have no regrets. We did it out of love for him.'

Dr Tan is strongly against euthanasia, saying that the real reason people choose to pull the plug on their relatives is to save money.


A day in an intensive care unit costs about $2,000.

He said: 'There is a Confucian saying which goes 'By the bedside of the chronic sick, there is no filial son'. Sadly, this is what's happening in Singapore now. Nobody wants to take care of their sick family members. So they choose the short-cut method of letting them die.' "

A moving and touching story. Stood out in Singapore today as there are talks of introducing/legalizing 'mercy killing' aka euthanasia.

This is a tough issue to deal with. Many readers of Dr Tan's situation will surely asked themselves, can they afford the money to keep their loved one alive for 18 years?

Lessons for me:

1. sometimes while we try our best to keep healthy by living a holistic healthy lifestyle, accidents or mishaps may rendered us in the stage of 'living without life'. In this case, is keeping us alive a good choice or to let us on and save money, especially when the family members have their own families to take care of and live a life free from this heavy financial burden? My answer is: let me pass away peacefully;

2. this lead to the question of leaving a 'living will' or the Advance Medical Directory (AMD) legalized by Singapore government many years ago when one can set the instruction to medical doctors to switch off the 'life subsistence machine' if we are certified 'medically dead' by qualified medical doctors without having to ask our beloved living members to 'switch off or not'! This is a good way to choose in my mind;

3. Dr Tan and his wife's love for their son is admirable. They had chosen what they feel are the right thing to do. It will be left to others who may have to make the decision to decide. There is no right or wrong here especially when we are talking about 'medically dead' person.

Euthanasia should not become the tool for people to end their lives pre-maturely or in a hurried manner. If people are allowed to die just because they will be financially ruin if they had to foot the bill, then the nation and the nation's medical care system is at fault. If the nation cannot afford to treat the 'medically dead' they should be allowed to die in peace and with dignity.

No comments: